It’s a dull, subdued sensation, when your heart is breaking,
like the muffled sound of a distant gunshot. It doesn’t physically pierce your
skin or tear you to pieces, but the sensation is physically present – the
paralyzing discomfort of realizing that something you took for granted is
leaving for good.
Although it’s hard to accept at first, this is actually a
good sign, having a broken heart. It means you have loved something, you have
tried for something, and you have let life teach you.
Life will attempt to break you down sometimes; nothing and
no one can completely protect you from this reality. Remaining alone and hiding
from the world won’t either, for endless, stagnant solitude will also break you
with unhealthy nostalgia and yearning.
You have to stand back up and put yourself out there again.
Your heart is stronger than you realize. I’ve been there and I’ve seen heartbreak
through to the other side. It takes time and patience.
Deep heartbreak is kind of like being lost in the woods –
every direction leads to nowhere at first. When you are standing in a forest of
darkness, you cannot see any light that could ever lead you home. But if you
wait for the sun to rise again, and listen when someone assures you that they
themselves have stood in that same dark place, and have since moved forward
with their life, oftentimes this will bring the hope that’s needed.
It’s so hard to give you advice when you’ve got a broken
heart, but some words can heal, and this is my attempt to give you hope. You
are stronger than you know!
Please remember…
- The
genuine, loving emotion that breaks your heart is oftentimes the same
emotion that will heal it, gradually, over time.
- The
person you liked or loved in the past, who treated you like dirt
repeatedly, has nothing intellectually or spiritually to offer you in the
present moment, but more headaches and heartache.
- You
can mull it over and obsess and obsess about how things turned out – what
you did wrong or should have done differently – but there’s no point. It
will NOT change anything right now!
- Some
chapters in our lives have to close without closure. There’s no
point in losing yourself by trying to hold on to what’s not meant to stay.
- Seven
letters. Two words. One saying. It can either cut you open to the core and
leave you in horrific pain, or it can free your heart and soul and lift an
incredible weight off your shoulders. The saying is: It’s over!
- When
you don’t get what you want, sometimes it’s necessary preparation, and
other times it’s necessary protection. But the time is never wasted. It’s
a step on your journey.
- Someday
you’re going look back on this time in your life as such an important time
of grieving and growing. You will see that you were in mourning and your
heart was breaking, but your life was changing.
- Transitions
in life are the perfect opportunity to let go of one situation to embrace
something even better coming your way.
- One of
the hardest lessons to learn: You
cannot change other people. Every interaction, rejection and
heartbreaking lesson is an opportunity to change yourself only.
- Be
determined to be positive. Understand that the greater part of your misery
or unhappiness from this point forward is determined not by your
circumstances, but by your attitude.
- Life
and God both have greater plans for you that don’t involve crying at night
or believing that you’re broken.
- It’s
always better to be alone than to be in bad company. And when you do
decide to give someone a chance, do so because you’re truly better off
with this person. Don’t do it just for the sake of not being alone.
- When
someone rejects you it doesn’t mean you need to also reject yourself or
think of yourself as less worthy. It doesn’t mean that nobody will ever
want you anymore. Remember that there are billions of people in the world
and only ONE person has rejected you. And it only hurts so bad right now
because, to you, that one person’s opinion represented the opinion of the
whole world. But that’s not the truth.
- Sometimes
it takes a broken heart to shake you awake and help you see that you are
worth so much more than you were settling for.
- When
you lose someone or something, don’t think of it as a loss, but as a gift
that lightens your load so you can better travel the path meant for you.
- Anything
that hurts you today only makes you stronger in the end.
- When
all is said and done, grief is the price you pay for love. And it’s better
to have loved, lost and learned, than to have never loved at all.
- A
broken heart is just the growing pains necessary so that you can love more
completely when the real thing comes along.
Afterthoughts
You are human and the human heart breaks sometimes. Don’t
fight it – fight
through it!
Give yourself a chance to love again, to feel again, and to
live again.
You are alive and here to risk your heart by putting it into
something you believe in, as many times as it takes. If you avoid taking this
chance, one thing is certain, you will make it safely to the end, feeling empty
and unfulfilled.
Don’t do that to yourself.
You deserve better.