I don’t know about you, but I love love. And I love showing
love to my husband. There is an endless number of possible ways to show love to
your partner, but sometimes you need some quick ideas. For just that scenario,
I’ve put together a list of 15 ways to show love and affection.
Most of these are not groundbreaking ideas. Many of them are
things you probably do for your spouse already. But it never hurts to have a
reminder of ways we can be more loving, especially when it comes to our
spouses.
Ready to knock your partner’s socks off with your tremendous love? Here are 15 easy ways to do just that:
1. Give them your full attention.
Give your partner your undivided attention when he or she is talking to you, just like you did when you were first dating. Don’t multi-task when communicating.
2. Anticipate their needs.
Try to predict what your partner wants before they even know they need or want
something. This stems from understanding the underlying values of your partner.
3. Know their love language.
Do they like acts of kindness, physical touch, gifts, or acts of service? Learn
this about your partner and love them this way to build a strong relationship,
says Dr. Lori
Whatley, a licensed marriage and family therapist.
4. Let them know you’re listening.
When your partner is speaking, listen for details and learn to validate your
partner by repeating back to them what they say. Communication is a key factor
to the satisfaction of a relationship, says Whatley.
5. Touch them.
Tell them daily you love them by touching them lovingly; it helps build
affection. Plus, people feel more secure in a relationship when there is
frequent romantic touch.
6. Always make time.
Make time for your partner, especially when you’re busy. “Return their texts or
phone calls and let them know they’re a priority, ” say s Whately. “Being
present and available to your partner is necessary for the relationship to
flourish.”
7. Make eye contact.
When we look at our partner and make eye contact when they’re speaking to us it
let’s them know we’re present with them. “We feel loved, seen, and validated
when someone is present in the current moment with us,” says Dr. Dori Gatter, a
psychotherapist and relationship expert.
8. Give them a hug.
“When you hug your partner make sure to be chest to chest and stomach to
stomach as our hearts and stomachs are where a large part of our nervous system
lives,” explains Gatter. “Hugging this way and pressing our heart and stomachs
helps to calm down our nervous systems.”
9. Tell them why they’re amazing.
Verbalize and communicate why you love them. Saying “I love you” is great. What
we love more is to knowing why someone loves us. What makes us different or
special that us the one someone picked? “Verbalizing and communicating why you
love your partner has a much deeper and meaningful impact,” says Gatter.
10. Get a little closer.
“Lean in and hold their hand when they speak. This shows them you truly value
what they’re saying and that you’re completely involved in their lives and
intertwined in their feelings,” says Margaux Cassuto, a relationship expert and matchmaker.
11. Pay attention to the little things.
Catch the small things they say (and don’t say) and act on it. For example,
remembering they like a hard-to-find wine and surprising them with it for no
reason at all.
12. Cheer them on.
Be their biggest fan and supporter both privately and in front of friends.
“Supporting your partner and allowing them to hear you compliment them feels
like a true act of love,” says Cassuto.
13. Ask them what they want.
Ask your partner how they feel most loved and what type of affection they
appreciate. “Too often, we assume that what we crave and desire is the same for
our partners,”says relationship and sex therapist, Eliza G. Boquin, MA,
LMFT. . “Finding out what your partner prefers takes the guesswork out of
it and you’re more likely to get the response you’re hoping for.”
14. Accept what they have to offer.
So often, we think that loving is all about giving. When one partner
does the giving and one partner does the receiving, it creates a relational
imbalance. “Make sure to accept and appreciate everything they give you,”
says Dr. Mark Borg, Jr., co-author of RELATIONSHIP SANITY: Creating
and Maintaining Healthy Relationships.
15. Don’t forget physical love.
Hug, kiss, and touch more. In the car, hold hands or place your hand on his
or her thigh. Come up from behind and surprise them with an embrace or a kiss
on the cheek or neck. Spoon on the couch while watching your favorite
show. Use every opportunity to touch a little more to really show how
much you love them.