HOW TO GET THE RING WITHOUT ASKING FOR IT

There’s a point that the relationship gets to that both sides cannot just deny the fact that they have gotten to their final destination. But the funny thing about this point of a relationship is that it suddenly starts to seem like everything is moving slower and like the guy is taking too long to ask the ‘big question’. The way a lady reacts to this long, unpleasant wait could either make or mar the relationship. In fact, just one wrong step can put an end to the whole big dream that seemed to be coming true. The nature of men is one that most times makes them easily pose patience when they are eager, calm when they are bitter, and normalcy when they are head over heels. Seeing a guy that you think would propose the next minute act so comfortable and unconcerned can easily make you jumpy and make you even wonder if it is ever going to happen. Now, the real composure and smartness of a lady need to come into place at this time. Trust me, you do not want to sound like you need it badly – the more desperate you sound, the more doubtful he gets. So the best advice I’d give is what I once told a friend, if you don’t have the patience, feign it.

I cannot tell you much since I am not a diviner. Yet, the three things I can tell you are indeed true. The very first of the three is that a man wants to get married, but wants to be ready. You should not start bugging him with the whole “my wedding will be classy” story thinking that it will help him act fast if you remind him that there is someone waiting for him to say the words. The bitter truth is that men get turned off by such moves. Second of the three is you shouldn’t pressure him in any way at all. The rule says “wait for him to ask” not “ask him to ask”. Marriage itself is enough to scare for any young man just venturing into that part of his life, so pushing him too hard might ignite even bigger fears and make him back out. The last but very big fact is that a man that proposes under too much pressure might just be making the walk down the wrong aisle. Men most times may need all the time in the world just to decide what they want. It cannot actually be true if we start to claim that there are fool-proof ways to ‘force’ the words out. Yet there are at least a few things that you could do to try to get you a ring as soon as possible. A few of these ways are listed below:

Do not build your all around a future yet to come

It is good to give that height of dedication to any relationship you find yourself in, especially the very serious ones. Still, it is vital that you do not create for yourself fantasies that do not exist. Save yourself the emotional stress of building a ‘House of Gold’ in a future that is still not in sight. It is easier to be patient if you have not already started secretly measuring for a wedding gown. Do not get too comfortable with the fact that he will eventually propose because you can never know until it has happened. A simple thing, don’t count your eggs before they hatch.

Keep him wanting more; be mysterious

We continue playing the popular game ‘Temple Run’ even when we know that it has no end. That is exactly how guys can be sometimes. They simply want something to chase till the very end. You don’t have to put in too much, just be free and don’t stop being fun. One of the best ways to keep yourself interesting to people is to never give them all of you at a time. Dish the dose of fun one day at a time and be there for him as much as you can. You’d become too sweet not to be given the ring.

Pull back a little

This is one delicate trade that all women eventually get to learn at some point in their life. That thing you do when a guy wants to plant a kiss that you desperately want, but you lean back just a bit just to make him come for it. This tactic works a lot because it awakens the sleeping guys to the fact that they could actually lose you if they don’t decide as quickly as possible. But you need to be careful not to overdo it, so that you do not push him too far from you.

Don’t be desperate

We have stressed this same point severally because it is the easiest way to break a close-to-the-altar relationship. The times when a man has to choose the big question is indeed one of the hardest he can have. At that time, his emotions are at the most delicate and he can easily make the most irreparable mistake out of anger or frustration. Be calm about it and know that the best comes to those who wait.

Don’t wait forever

Please, do not put your life on a hold just to wait for the ring that might never come (let’s be pessimistic just a bit). You have to ensure that you go on with vital plans in your life so as not to plan your life around an uncertain future like we discussed in the very first subtopic. Make sure that your life remains on a steady move and that you do not put a stop to your own arrangements while hoping that he will propose.

Be ready to ask yourself “what if he never proposes?”. The truth is that there are some guys out there who know how to make it look like you are going home to mama when you are not, so be free to at a very dire point when you find that he’s taking too long, to hint him a bit that you could consider moving on if he’s so uncertain. As a lady you know that you do not have to do this directly. You can always device the most subtle and polite way to make him see that side of the coin.