If you think your marriage is in trouble, do not wait. Seek help as soon as possible.
The longer you wait, the hard it will be to get your relationship back on track.
The Effectiveness of Marriage Counseling
Marriage and couples counseling is effective. According to the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists, couples therapy enjoys a high rate of satisfaction. Data compiled from actual couples who have participated in marriage counseling support this rating: More than 98% report they were extremely satisfied with the experience.
The degree to which the therapy is successful depends on many factors. Sometimes, a partner has already mentally and emotionally abandoned the relationship and decided to end the marriage. Some of the factors that can influence the effectiveness of couples’ therapy include:
- Each partner’s dedication to therapy and motivation to change ― To achieve success, both partners must be motivated to change.
- The degree to which the maladaptive patterns are ingrained into the relationship ― The couple must be able to change their deeply ingrained patterns of interacting with each other. Some couples simply cannot or will not change.
- Ongoing substance abuse and mental illness ― If one of the partners has untreated substance abuse or mental illness issues, then that partner must adhere to a treatment plan to resolve relationship issues successfully.
- Domestic violence —Domestic violence issues between the partners must be treated for marital therapy to be useful.
As is evident, marriage or couples counseling is an effective way for couples of all kinds to reduce or resolve conflict in their relationship and, at the same time, learn new skills to help them interact with each other in positive, adaptive ways. Completing marriage counseling often helps couples strengthen their relationship and build a solid foundation for their future together.
What Type of Couple Gets the Most From Marriage Counseling?
- Younger couples
- Non-sexist and egalitarian couples
- Couples who are still in love with each other
- Couples who are open to therapy and change
- Partners willing to look at themselves and their flaws
What Type of Couple Gets the Least from Marriage Counseling?
- Couples who wait too long before seeking help
- Marriages with one or the other spouse set on getting a divorce
- Married individuals who are closed to any suggestions that may save the marriage
- Marriages with one partner addicted to alcohol, drugs or pornography
- Marriage with one partner showing up to sessions but is not invested in the work
What to Expect From Marriage Counseling
The counselor may request that the couples complete an assessment or ask questions about their relationship and their expectations or goals for therapy. Some of the common areas explored during the first session include:
- History of the relationship
- Nature of the problems
- Cultural background or family-of-origin information
- Values
In addition, if the couple is currently experiencing a crisis, the counselor may provide immediate crisis intervention to help stabilize the situation.
After the initial assessment, the therapist assists the couple in identifying their goals for therapy and detailing the structure of the sessions. The therapist may also explain the theoretical or therapeutic process. Then, the actual treatment phase of therapy will begin.
During the active treatment phase of therapy, the couple works on the problem areas that they have identified as their focus. The therapist will help the couple understand their roles in their maladaptive interactions and find a healthier way to interact with each other. Many therapists assign therapeutic “homework” for the couples to complete outside of the therapy sessions. Working on these assignments helps the couple learn to apply and practice the skills they have learned at therapy during their day-to-day interactions with each other.
Do you need help with marriage counseling?
You can find a marriage counselor now.