Valentine's is the day most misinterpreted and most abused by most people. Of the whole 365 days of the year, it is the day most youth, especially teenagers, fall victim to lies and lust. For many, it is a day of exploration, experimentation, exploitation, and discovery. And predictably, it is a day many will yield their virginity. A day many are lured, when some are coerced, and others are willing lambs for the slaughtering slab. Many will have sex with the wrong person, for the wrong reason, under the wrong circumstances.
For most singles that cross the sexual divide, the day mostly ends with disappointment or with an experience that rings bitterly far into the future.
Valentine's Day did not originate from God. Evidence shows it was designed by Satan to influence single adults and married folks into engaging in sexually immoral relations that are prohibited by God and which include adultery and fornication - Hebrews 13:4.
Today, this day is mostly celebrated by men and women who are not legally married to each other. They spend the day engaging in sexually immoral practices under the dubious claim of showing love to each other. This is not strange though because the day has always been associated with involvement in sexual debauchery.
Here is what one international source has told us: "Valentine's Day comes on the feast day of two different Christian martyrs named Valentine. But the customs connected with the day . . . probably come from an ancient Roman festival called Lupercalia which took place every February 15. The festival honored Juno, the Roman goddess of women and marriage, and Pan, the god of nature" (The World Book Encyclopedia, 1973, vol. 20, p. 204).
Another major source has observed that the Roman holiday which gave rise to Valentine and which was for many years called Lupercalia was “celebrated with pagan sex rituals and that it was about “eroticism, lust, and fertility.”
The source further notes: “As early as the fourth B.C., young men seek their sexual partner during the Lupercalia festival. By a “love” lottery, young men would be able to win the companionship and sexual service of a woman until the next year’s drawing.”
As to why Christians should not observe Valentine, this source also notes: “There is no doubt that the origin of Valentine’s Day involves strong infatuation and lust rather than genuine love. There are a lot of unmarried couples who use Valentine’s Day as an excuse to participate in pre-marital sex. Often, this sexual act leads to an unwanted and unplanned pregnancy. Sadly, some resort to abortion just to “correct” their mistakes.”
The source further asks: “Why do so many Christians limit their love on a specific day, in this case, Valentine’s Day? Wouldn’t it be great to demonstrate your love every single day? Married couples or those who are in a relationship can show their love and concern every day and not wait for Valentine’s Day to arrive. After all, even if you celebrate your love on Valentine’s Day, it really feels awkward since this day celebrates lust and not true love.”
(See the article entitled “10 Simple but Powerful Reasons Christians Should Not Celebrate Valentine’s Day, January 27, 2016).
TEENAGERS ARE VALENTINE CASUALTIES
Throw in their cognitive restructuring, their brain is least developed for rational and intelligent decision-making. It is programmed for impulsive and instant action, not delayed gratification for excitement, fun, thrills, and novelty that this season provides. Their sense of values -what is right and appropriate-, especially in sex and sexual matters are just forming. Don’t be carried away, no matter how sexually savvy they appear they are still sexually misinformed - just loads of sexual messages but few sexual facts.
Parents are not helping teenagers’ lot; they mystify sex and leave teenagers in thick ignorance. Peers help in the casualty process by wrongly indoctrinating (mostly through peer pressure) their fellow teenagers into the sexual train -the blind leading the blind by the hand.
The society shy from giving teenagers the right information and sexual protection, it rather piles them with double standards and double messages.
No wonder teenagers are confused, frightened, mystified, mesmerized, and curious about sex, by their sexuality, by their parents’ reign of silence, and by the media glamorization of sex. They wonder and imagine and strain on the leash.
A SEASON WITHOUT CASUALTIES
At this season more than ever, there is a greater need for parents to educate their teenagers about sex. No matter how strong and unhealthy the media, peers, and socio-cultural influence on her, you are the primary influence on your teen’s life and you have the greatest influence. The right, reliable, and needed information you armed her with about sex; the values you inculcate in her, especially sexual values; the unconditional love, acceptance, and validation you show her; the protection and supervision you give her; the standards and limits you set for her with friends, household members, and relatives, especially after school, during holiday and vacations, will all show during Valentine.
Remember, what teenagers don’t learn about sex at home, they will definitely learn outside the home, and the more they know about sex from you, the less they are likely to learn from exploiting outsiders, and the less they are likely to abuse sex.
RESULTS AND SCORES
Heartbreaks, guilt and shame, pregnancies, diseases, unfinished education, forced marriages, early marriages, single parenthood, economic hardship and dependency, illegitimate fathers, and a world devoid of responsible males follow in the wake of Valentine. And many of the mistakes are irreversible. It starts and ends with the parents.
THE WAY OUT
The devil has come but to kill, maim, and destroy (John 10:10) and he is snatching teenagers in his huge paws with all imaginable sexual tricks, lies, ploys, and gimmicks. Valentine's Day is such a day for him to go full throttle on the gimmicks! Get on the right side and protect your destiny! Keep these guidelines with you: Action controls feeling. Not the other way round. If you think, confess or do funny things, you will have funny feelings, and you are likely to do funny things. Watch your inner life!
Stay off sex-danger zones. Don’t stay in privacy with him or her. Make a decision not to go where you are not supposed to go. Remember privacy is the strength of adultery.
You cannot handle sex and sexual temptation all by yourself, you need God. Pray and read the Bible. Prayer gives you power, and the Word gives you strength.