You’ve made it to this point, and no matter how you got here, from high-school sweethearts to a lucky right-swipe, you’re ready to ask the big question.
There’s no doubt it’s a big question. The only question you
have to ask is: are you ready to ask? Here are some things to consider before
you propose:
1. Are you both on the same page?
The spontaneous proposal is wonderful, but the idea of
marriage shouldn’t be a surprise. You can start by talking about a friend who
recently got engaged. Ask how your partner feels about marriage. Find out what
hopes and dreams your partner has for the future. If you’re both pointed in the
same direction, you’ll not only have a successful proposal but a long, happy
marriage.
2. Talk to the parents
Is this a bit old-fashioned? Yes. But you really should do
it. If you have a good relationship with your future fiancé’s parents, this
should be a breeze. Tell them how much in love you are with their son or
daughter. Let them know that you are planning to propose, and (this will really
get their buy-in) ask them to be part of the big event!
3. Buy the ring
Starting this process can be as easy as paying some extra
attention to the jewelry she
already wears. If possible, take a picture. A talented jeweler will be able to
pinpoint the style she likes. If you can’t pull that off, get snooping on her
Pinterest board. As a last resort, pull one of her friends aside and get some
important intel.
It’s also important to get the size right. Here are a few
things you can do:
- “Borrow”
a ring from her collection and take it to a jeweler to size
- Slip
one of her rings on your own finger and mark where it stops
- Many
jewelers can make an estimate based on your partner’s height and weight
- Or
simply ask!
The good news is, even if you don’t get it exactly right,
you can always have it resized.
4. Get personal with the proposal
Give some thought to your partner’s personality. If he or
she is the type who would love all the attention of doing this on the kiss-cam
at an NBA game, go for it! But if that’s the kind of thing that would mortify
her, maybe save that for another time. Is there a favorite spot that is
meaningful? Is there an elegant restaurant where you’d love to ask the
question? However you do it, the more personal you can make it, the bigger the
impact you’ll make.
5. Turn to the pros
Yep, there are people who get paid to do this kind of thing.
Proposal planners can help you with everything from securing the venue to
making sure it looks beautiful. This kind of luxury doesn’t come cheap, but the
payoff for this investment can be pretty spectacular.
6. Prepare notes. Rehearse. Rehearse. Rehearse.
Again, don’t…freak…out. But keep in mind that emotions will
be running high and this is no time to forget your lines! It doesn’t have to be
an elegant poem, but give some thought to what you want to say so you’re not
just winging it. Oh, and don’t forget to include the “will you marry me” line.
That part is key!
7. Prepare your backstory
If this is going to be a surprise, come up with a foolproof
alibi so your significant other doesn’t know what’s up. If a sudden extra-fancy
get-away shows up on the schedule, it may tip her off. Work with friends to
prepare the perfect surprise.
8. Keep the ring safe
Once you buy the ring, be sure it’s insured. As soon as it
is in your possession, find a place to keep it secure, and make sure you take
extra precaution to prevent it from slipping from your hands or tumbling out of
your pocket before the big reveal.
9. What to do during the proposal
Don’t…freak…out (see a theme here?). Secondly, don’t spoil
the surprise by having a bulky ring-box in your pocket. There are plenty of
ways to sneak the ring into your hands. One new invention is from a company
called Yes Girls. It’s called a “Box Sock” that adds a tiny pocket and small
box to your sock. When you stoop down on one knee, like magic, you can reveal
the ring!
10. Find the right moment.
Don’t rush (see above). Make sure everything feels right.
Take a deep breath and ask the question when you’re ready.
11. Have a photographer ready.
Plan to have a friend nearby or hire a pro. If your partner
has no idea the proposal is coming, you will get amazing photos you’ll cherish
forever.
12. Popping the question.
When the moment comes, take a deep breath, collect your
thoughts, and make the magic happen. Let your partner soak in the moment. Laugh
and cry together. When he or she is ready, put the ring on and make it
official!
Celebrate!
You did it! Now’s the time to bring in the friends, the champagne, and start snapping selfies! Proposal day is a day like no other. You both deserve to enjoy it, savor it, and celebrate like nobody’s business.